NEW YEAR RE-CAP: of the last three weeks

In the spirit of endless New Year re-caps dominating the intranot and VH1, we thought we'd do one covering the last three weeks of pop. We could have done the whole year but can't be bothered and it's never that interesting, or fun. So here we go:

1. We bought Girls Aloud's new album and it's fantastic, forcing us to eat our hats and go back on our words stating that they may have "lost it a bit". We've been listening to the intro of Biology over and over and have decided it is possibly the best pop intro of 2005. It's unfortunately still all downhill from then on, but the rest of the album makes up for it.

And that is that! Three weeks which, you'll agree, reflect the general state of pop in 2005: IN NEED OF A GOOD LOLLY SURGE. Here's to hoping Kylie comes back with something great in 2006, happy new year.

SPUNK xx

ps. SPUNK HQs are relocating to North London, we will therefore be inactive until we have the Telewest man round. You can feast on our archives whilst we're gone. x

SORRY: one thousand Madonnas!!!

This is the artwork for Madonna's new single Sorry:
Or maybe it's this, we're not quite sure:

SPUNK SPINS: Debbie Harry sings in french! badly!

1. Hi_Tack - Say Say Say

2. Girls Aloud - Watch Me Go

3. Jose Gonzales - Heartbeats

4. Blondie - Denis

5. Daft Punk - Make Love

RICHARD ASHCROFT COMPETITION: results

Dearest SPUNK readers, here are the three finalists for our amazing DESIGN YOUR OWN RICHARD ASHCROFT CD SLEEVE competition:

David Roper from New York submitted this little gem. Superb! However, David, a keen eye will no doubt notice you used the popular Tahoma font to write the name of the artist and the album's imaginative title, when we quite specifically asked for Times New Roman. No harm done, but read the guidelines carefully next time.

Sven Roock from Sweden sent us this impressive design. A personal favourite of ours and potential winner, had it not been for the inexplicable green rectangle located in the picture's background. Sven, nowhere does it state in our '9 easy-step guide' that the picture should contain a green rectangle! I mean, what is this, a PetShopBoys cd sleeve competition?! No it is not.

Laura Burrows from Wales, congratulations. A no-brainer: the picture is breathtaking, the font is right, and there are no green shapes of any form in the background. Ladies and Gentlemen, your winner.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY: mimi's 17th

Mariah has recently celebrated her 17th Number 1 single in America with Don't Forget About Us, according to their Billboard Piping Hot 674 Countdown, or some nonesuch chart they have out there. It's a big deal as only the The Beatles have scored more number ones in the States.

We at SPUNK aren't too sure whether that's a good thing, as she is clearly a vile creature of insanely bloated proportions, yet we seem to have most of her albums on our iPods, and we're somewhat eternally greateful for the mental phase and suicide attempts that followed Glitter, as well as the hilarious string of sex-crazed outfits and poses in her recent videos and public appearances. (£1 to whoever can find a screen-cap of her leg over the swimming-pool in the video for Don't Forget About Us).

Mimi, you vile, vile thing; we hate to love you.

KEVIN FEDERLINE: never judge a book

This is leaving us rather speechless: http://www.kevinfederline.com/

WE DON'T UNDERSTAND WILL'S NEW VIDEO

What on earth is it meant to be about? A homage to Cuban liberation in which William plays Che Guevara? An assembled string of slow long-shots and close-ups of people wearing strange veils? A retro, sexually ambiguous revisiting of The Dreamers? It seems Will struggles to get both videos and songs right at the same time.

PINK: "I'm not dead"

"Pink is so over", "Isn't she a man in drag?", "She's such a clit-tease". Hush we say! The gayest straight girl in Pop (who used to be RnB and now kinda Rock etc get over it) is B. A. C. K. with a new album called I'm Not Dead - do you see? Because she's been out of the limelight for a while people might have assumed she was dead. Well she's not. Good.

She's shot two videos for two different songs for the first single, cuz she couldn't decide which song she liked best or some nonsense, but either way it will not be a double a-side. Repeat NOT A DOUBLE A-SIDE. One song is called You And Your Hand, which is about men feeling girls up in clubs (Pink is so strong and independent, we just know she won't stand for that) and the other song, Stupid Girl, spoofs the young, superficial Hollywood, Hilton-style girls (Pink is so strong and independent, we just know etc).

This is all good news. Not as good news as, say, Britney or Christina being back with new material but good none-the-less.

SPUNK COMPETITION: make your own Richard Ashcroft cd sleeve!

Dear readers, we urge you to partake in our very first online competition. It is called: MAKE YOUR OWN RICHARD ASHCROFT CD SLEEVE! Interactive! To do so, simply take a look at Rich's amazing album cover for forthcoming lp Keys To The World:

Inspired yet? Thought so. Well, in order to help you on your way to free artistic expression, just follow our '9 easy-step guide' to MAKING YOUR OWN RICHARD ASHCROFT CD SLEEVE:

Step 1: Take a picture of yourself walking down a street

Step 2: Write 'Richard Ashcroft Keys To The World' in the top, left-hand corner in Times New Roman

Step 3: oh...

Step 9: Congratulations! You're a talented album sleeve designer earning millions from trendy commissions!! Fantastic.

Now send us your masterpieces to spunkmagazine@hotmail.co.uk and we promise to post the best ones very soon. Get creative!

THEFT: the greatest form of flattery