THE DESPERATION OF MIMI: Mariah's boobs

Click to enlarge.

UK TOP40: yesterday's chart today

BREAKING NEWS: Fightstar score a top 20 hit! In at number 20, 'Grand Unification (part 1)' sees Charlie and the boys get their first taste of what Charlie and the other boys used to get on a weekly basis!

In other chart news: highest entry goes to Pharrell and Gwen, whilst second-highest entry goes to Craig David with 'Don't Love You No More' in at number 4, which prompts one to ask the following: Who still buys that shit?

Considering that both the excellent Goldfrapp and the really-quite-good Eurythmics scored lesser chart rankings (at a respective 9 and 14), SPUNK can only assume that the record-buying public of Great Britain is fronted by GHD'd labradors on London daytrips from Southampton.

MADONNA: "I've still got it!"

"lol", what will she think of next?

THE X FACTOR: bye bye Chenai

The X-Factor's Chenai Zinyuku chooses to laugh in the face of her detracters, and starts working hard on 'My New Size 8' for Heat magazine.

Good on you, Chenai!

MTV EMAS: madonna's leotards rock

It was all very Euro, wasn't it? Even Robbie's stage-dive felt contrived :(

JARED LETO: bland but hot

Jared Leto's band 30 Seconds To Mars is a bit bland (smooth vocals over screechy guitars etc) but that's ok because he is well buff. See their video for 'Attack' here:

http://www.ifilm.com/player/?ifilmId=2680636&refsite=7103

SPUNK SPINS: spinnin' around

It's been a pretty boring week in SPUNK's iTunes library... These little gems have kept us amused.

1. Kevin Federline - Y'all Ain't Ready

2. Goldfrapp - Satin Chic

3. Sebastien Tellier - La Ritournelle

4. Fiona Apple - Not About Love

5. Lindsay Lohan - Confessions Of A Broken Heart (Daughter To Father)

PEACHES: kick it

We at SPUNK fucking love Peaches. Especially when she makes videos like 2004's 'Kick it' with Iggy Pop. It features Peaches' croth, Iggy's tits, zombies and some fantastic thigh-high boots. Quite possibly our favourite video ever. See it here:

http://www.xlrecordings.com/broadcast/~kickit/

KATE BUSH: amazing

Unless you've been living under a rock, or are just completely INSANE, you will be aware that genius popstrel from the past Kate Bush is back with a new album! It is called Aerial, will be released on the 7th of November and is a doucle-cd (which is usually a bad idea but she's been off for 12 years, so we'll allow it). There is a track on the album called Mrs Bartolozzi, which is about a housewife drifting off into a dream world while watching her clothes rotate in the dryer! Amazing!

GWEN & PHARRELL: poor effort

The video for Pharrell Williams and Gwen Stefani's 'Can I Have It Like That' is bloody rubbish. Not that we think of them as pillars of innovation when it comes to pop imagery (yes Gwen, we have noticed your red lipstick and no, we're not impressed), but it seems they could have at least hired someone clever to make them look good. Instead, we get fed a virtual check-list of every hiphop cliche usually reserved for 50cent.

One more bad move on either of their parts, and SPUNK will be forced to issue its first Embargo of Pop.